It's oddly comforting...he's drunk Beat's blood, he can recognize Beat's heart now, could pick its rhythm out of a crowd, and having it this close, warm and alive, is calming him down.
But what isn't calming is the way Beat's talking. It's familiar. It's how every new person who's never really been brought down in their own world feels. Atem takes a deep breath, then lets it out.]
I hope you're right. But don't count on it. Everyone's brought down, here. Everyone's vulnerable.
...I'd never been stopped, before I came here.
[But he's lost, and lost, and lost, ever since, and when he's tried to turn over the cards and figure out why, all he's been able to figure out, is...
...he hasn't been playing by the right rules. He's been swimming upstream, by trying to make a name for himself while remaining neutral, trying to help humans and monsters alike. It's been killing him, and getting his loved ones in trouble, too.
That said...even though he's been losing, suffering, and reaching out to others anyway, and that approach was wrong...
...he hasn't lost everything, has he? Somehow, even though he was ready to throw out every bond he'd made, if that was what it took, some of them stood by him. He has a power now that'll protect him, but...he also still has a few friends.
"I wish for friends," he thinks, remembers. "Friends I can count on, friends who can count on me, no matter what..."
Remembering that wish makes his throat close up tighter, and Beat's fur might end up a little damp. Atem doesn't know what he wanted, what he needed, what he'd even have asked for, before it came to this. He just knows he didn't have it, and his situation couldn't go on the way it was. He also knows he wants to keep Beat, and Ray and Cairo and Altair and Horatio. He has to protect himself first, but that's not all he wants, not all he needs. He breathes, in and out, and can't tell if he feels better, or not.]
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It's oddly comforting...he's drunk Beat's blood, he can recognize Beat's heart now, could pick its rhythm out of a crowd, and having it this close, warm and alive, is calming him down.
But what isn't calming is the way Beat's talking. It's familiar. It's how every new person who's never really been brought down in their own world feels. Atem takes a deep breath, then lets it out.]
I hope you're right. But don't count on it. Everyone's brought down, here. Everyone's vulnerable.
...I'd never been stopped, before I came here.
[But he's lost, and lost, and lost, ever since, and when he's tried to turn over the cards and figure out why, all he's been able to figure out, is...
...he hasn't been playing by the right rules. He's been swimming upstream, by trying to make a name for himself while remaining neutral, trying to help humans and monsters alike. It's been killing him, and getting his loved ones in trouble, too.
That said...even though he's been losing, suffering, and reaching out to others anyway, and that approach was wrong...
...he hasn't lost everything, has he? Somehow, even though he was ready to throw out every bond he'd made, if that was what it took, some of them stood by him. He has a power now that'll protect him, but...he also still has a few friends.
"I wish for friends," he thinks, remembers. "Friends I can count on, friends who can count on me, no matter what..."
Remembering that wish makes his throat close up tighter, and Beat's fur might end up a little damp. Atem doesn't know what he wanted, what he needed, what he'd even have asked for, before it came to this. He just knows he didn't have it, and his situation couldn't go on the way it was. He also knows he wants to keep Beat, and Ray and Cairo and Altair and Horatio. He has to protect himself first, but that's not all he wants, not all he needs. He breathes, in and out, and can't tell if he feels better, or not.]