[Ryou knows that what he's going to do...it could mean trouble mid-month. It's big, he's making sure it's big.
It has to be big, if he intends to gain something more from the Fog for his trouble.
Up until this point, he's avoided doing more than share eye contact with Atem, but once he's asked, he reaches a hand out, tentatively, and sets it on one of Atem's knees.]
I want your understanding. And, if you were up to it, your comfort. But I'm not asking for more than that. What I'm doing will likely anger those who can't understand why it's being done, and those who are rightfully upset for whatever I might cause them to endure.
...I'm not sure that I'll do what Beat did though. I have to see where the pieces fall once everything goes to hell.
[It will. He doesn't doubt it.]
I know it won't ever be a perfect plan, but I hope that it means something to you that...I want to be stronger, and that I don't want you to help me with this. You've done enough for me, and...truthfully, I don't want you involved more than you need to be, for your sake.
[Atem is still fragile around the edges, and that is Ryou's fault.]
And anyway...leading up to the eventual overload, I...I might not be myself, Atem. The feelings start to amplify the closer it gets to critical mass, and the gem can't hold them alone. That means...I-I'm going to be upset, a lot.
I don't want you to feel like you need to stay for my sake, but I hope you understand that those words aren't coming from a normal place. I love you. I do.
[It'd be better if, once Ryou gets too far gone, they were apart again, even if it makes Ryou's head hurt, and his eyes burn and his ears lower in sheer upset at the thought. He's tired of it, of them being split apart.
It makes him scared, because that might need to be their reality, gem or no gem. Maybe it'd be better...but he doesn't want to give Atem up. It's painful to think about it...]
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It has to be big, if he intends to gain something more from the Fog for his trouble.
Up until this point, he's avoided doing more than share eye contact with Atem, but once he's asked, he reaches a hand out, tentatively, and sets it on one of Atem's knees.]
I want your understanding. And, if you were up to it, your comfort. But I'm not asking for more than that. What I'm doing will likely anger those who can't understand why it's being done, and those who are rightfully upset for whatever I might cause them to endure.
...I'm not sure that I'll do what Beat did though. I have to see where the pieces fall once everything goes to hell.
[It will. He doesn't doubt it.]
I know it won't ever be a perfect plan, but I hope that it means something to you that...I want to be stronger, and that I don't want you to help me with this. You've done enough for me, and...truthfully, I don't want you involved more than you need to be, for your sake.
[Atem is still fragile around the edges, and that is Ryou's fault.]
And anyway...leading up to the eventual overload, I...I might not be myself, Atem. The feelings start to amplify the closer it gets to critical mass, and the gem can't hold them alone. That means...I-I'm going to be upset, a lot.
I don't want you to feel like you need to stay for my sake, but I hope you understand that those words aren't coming from a normal place. I love you. I do.
[It'd be better if, once Ryou gets too far gone, they were apart again, even if it makes Ryou's head hurt, and his eyes burn and his ears lower in sheer upset at the thought. He's tired of it, of them being split apart.
It makes him scared, because that might need to be their reality, gem or no gem. Maybe it'd be better...but he doesn't want to give Atem up. It's painful to think about it...]