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knifemonopoly) wrote2021-02-05 06:28 pm
knifemonopoly) wrote2021-02-05 06:28 pm
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WELCOME TO YOUR PRIVATE CHANNEL, PLAYER1. FOR SECURE COMMUNICATION, USE 10.11.0.0.01 *** PLAYER1 has joined 10.11.0.0.01 <PLAYER1> If you're looking for someone you knew as Yugi before June, you've found him! It's Atem, leave a message. | ||||
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[He shakes his head, lightly.]
There's no "should." There's just what is, and what isn't. You should do exactly what you want to do. Even if it frightened me, it was your move to make, not mine.
Don't think about it as "doing better."
[Better. He's tried so hard to do better, and it's worn him thin, worn him out...]
Think about it as finding out who you are. What you're okay with, and what you aren't. Don't make yourself do something you're not okay with....that just leads to regret.
[Take it from him. He pushed himself so hard, in September and October...and for what? What was it all for?]
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Sometimes what I have to do doesn't align with what I think is okay. That's just how it is here. If what I wanted always aligned with what I needed, then I wouldn't be with the Fog right now.
But I am, because without Her strength behind these claws, I'd be too weak to protect myself, much less anyone else around me.
...And sometimes, what I really, really want doesn't align with who I think I should be. And when that happens...I want to be something else.
[Not someone else. Something else. He still wants to be "Ryou Bakura", but not as a shade. Not with that burning resentment that eats at him like acid reducing away layers of his skin, slowly but painfully.
Suddenly, Ryou draws in a long, almost painful-sounding breath.]
Listen...t-this isn't what we should be doing. You're supposed to be focused on your recovery. Is this really what you want to talk about right now?
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[His tongue comes out -- he licks at the side of Ryou's mouth. Why does he think it'll make Ryou feel better, that he does that? Atem has no idea. But he does it.]
There's no winning, here...no way to truly get everything you want. There's only choices.
And I'm with you, no matter what choice you make. You won't be alone. You'll fly yourself, but...I'll be there to catch you.
[Lick, lick.]
And I like you how you are. [Another lick.] All of the ways you are.
[It's not kissing, exactly. It's weird. But he's high. Feels correct.]
no subject
Demon Atem didn't care. Evidently, werewolf Atem was embracing his nature.
...To be fair, Ryou's sure the meds have a little to do with that. And yet he smiles, and lets out a happy little dog noise, the same familiar one that he lets out when he's fully relaxing.]
Oh, stop...you're being too much. No wonder you have so many friends who would come help save you. H-heheh! And it's very clear that you have biases for dubiously overpowered gamers.
[Like Ryou.
...And now it's his turn to lick Atem, right on the nose. Fine, fine, if they're going to stay on this topic, the least he can do is make it a little less dour...right?]
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I don't know what you mean. I'm perfectly objective, and -- [It's nuzzling time.] -- impartial --
Clearly not partial to anyone present.
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He wants to be next to him. He wants to share warmth and be as close as possible, and only when he's slithered his way into a reasonable position that doesn't end with him sitting on Atem's tail does he lick at the corner of Atem's mouth himself.
Despite himself, he lets out a soft sound that might placate a more dominant wolf, if that was the kind of atmosphere they were fostering in this apartment
(maybe it is?)
as he curls his tail over Atem's lap. Warm. Together. Good.]
Indeed.
[Look he apologized before he even infused as much sass into that single words as possible, but here's another lick for good measure.]
no subject
It is extremely contented.
He doesn't have it in him to sass back. He's finding himself relaxing...even if he's not sure he got through to Ryou what he wanted to say, and he's not sure he's happy with Ryou's answers, they're what Ryou's choosing...so...
...so, he gets comfortable, and settles in to rest as hard as he can.]
TIMESKIP!
Throughout the next few days, Ryou continues to take care of Atem, feeding him, giving him plenty of food, drawing his eye so that they can see each other, and basically doing his best to keep Atem comfortable during this time. He also goes to all of the parties with Atem because protect.
However...Atem needs to hunt for himself soon. Ryou can't just keep giving him human flesh piecemeal, not if he intends to help Atem stay properly nourished. A werewolf benefits from the entire process, given their high prey drive--the hunt sates a psychological need, and the meat sates a physical need. It's pretty hard to hunt with no eyes though, and the pain of the injury that still remains, where they were burned out. Furthermore, the Fog wasn't fixing it...and Ryou was getting very concerned.
So. After some discussion, Ryou had offered to use his tier 3 ability to take Atem's lingering injury, then shift it onto another target, and they'd come to an agreement.
Getting to that point was the hard part. Hunting? That was easy, honestly. Ryou makes as much of a game of it as he can, and hopes that Atem's not too medicated to give them away. He rather doubts it though. Atem can be quiet, right?
Ryou keeps them pretty close to home, and because his fur is far too light to be inconspicuous within the area he'd chosen, he slips into the shadowy form of his tier 2 ability. It has a different scent quality than what Atem will have been used to at this point, but it should still be easy enough to follow.
He takes point, quietly stalking after an older gentleman. This guy...well, he's a little out of Ryou's choice of mark, but he was no less worthy of what was about to happen to him. Ryou had explained it to Atem, of course, why they were on this human above all else.
He was an opportunist and a bully, the kind of guy who throws his weight around just because he can. He's the owner of a small local bookshop, and he has the habit of undercutting high-value books to buy, while selling them for a massive profit margin. That on its own wouldn't be enough, but to add insult to injury, those who don't sell to him have their houses marked, and he hires thieves to "pick up his merchandise" anyway. He'd recently begun to hire those same thugs to rob one or two houses that had acquired his books through fair pricing, only to resell the merchandise once more.
That's who they're going to kill today. Another scammer, another human eating humans, so to speak.
So that's who Ryou crosses paths with, as a spectral creature with too-bright eyes, cutting into his path silently.]
cw animal hair pulling as self harm??
He's gotten antsier and antsier as the fog receded. The god is at full power, maybe more, but Atem's sight hasn't come back. And, on top of that, he's felt more and more cooped up. For the first time in his nerdy gamer life, Atem actually wants to run, jump, chase, kill--
...but he's got to keep that under control. He can't kill without a game. He won't. Even if his skin feels electric, and his feet want to thump on the ground, and he's taken to chewing at his own fur (a deeply weird habit, one he doesn't like), he's got to --
He's got to test this guy.
But it's likely a terrifying sight, when Mr. Bookseller backs away from the spectral wolf, and glances over his shoulder, and sees a blindfolded werewolf with eyes painted on, its jaw working, its limbs twitching, clawed feet approaching step by ponderous step.]
M̸r̶.̵ ̸B̴o̶o̵k̸s̶e̴l̵l̸e̵r̶.̷.̸.̷
[It's a low, low rumble. Atem's chest is just a little broader than usual, he's just a little taller, and his vocal cords aren't human.]
I̷ ̸w̵a̵n̶t̶ ̵t̶o̷ ̵p̷l̷a̴y̴ ̶a̴ ̴g̵a̵m̸e̶.̷
[Fear creeps over the man's face. It's clear when he recognizes that this is that guy from TV...he doesn't have the right hair, but monsters, who can even tell with monsters? And he's got a shadow with him, just like everybody says...
He tries to run.]
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Ryou's still there, cutting off the bookseller on the opposite side, his lips curling back to reveal pointed teeth that appear luminescent against his shadowy form. The message is clear. Pass at your own peril. This is one shadow that won't warn you twice.]
Where are you going?
[Ryou's voice is higher pitched than Atem's, but it's still at a lower register than his usual voice, and there's an odd, hissing quality to it.]
Surely you haven't got anymore business, right? The store is closed...there's no reason to be out so late.
[Unless, of course, he was busy trying to make arrangements for something profitable...and untoward. Ryou, naturally, knows that he's out here for an exchange of ill-gotten goods. That's the point.]
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It's so hard, when the man runs, not to run him down. Atem's jaws open, his hands twitch open and shut as he tamps down the impulse to chase.
He has to swallow back saliva.
It's Ryou's self-mastery that helps keep Atem under control...though he can't help letting out a laugh, when the man skids to a halt, realizing that the wolves are faster than he is.]
H̶e̴h̶ ̴h̷e̶h̴.̸ ̴H̵͔̾ẻ̶̖h̶̦͊ ̸̭̄Ḧ̴͕͕́Ë̵͕͓́Ḧ̶̛̞́ ̵͙̅͝H̶̗̺́̎Ę̸̋Ĥ̶̱̯̚-̷̻͑-̴̦̜̄̚
[All of his senses are killing him. Sight, sound, smell, all of it's telling him this man is prey. This man should be allowed to run, so that Atem can chase him.
But it's no good...if it's not fair...]
Don't worry. All my games are ones you can win!
[Atem licks his lips.
It's clear that the man knows the werewolf wants to eat him.
"W-w-what s-sort of game?" he asks.]
Normally, I'd put together something to do with your greedy business practices, but...
[But he's hungry. He's itching to get this guy.]
...this time, I want you to go about your business! The trick is...no matter what you do...
[The werewolf's jaws enunciate each syllable, slowly and carefully.]
D̶o̵n̴'̶t̷ ̵R̷̤̿Ü̸̘Ṇ̷̎.̴̟̀
[That's it. That's the only rule. But someone so used to having others do his dirty work...he'll crack under the pressure. Atem's sure of it.]
We won't touch you, as long as you stay at a walking pace! But if you run...you're dog-meat!
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The outcome of this is up to you. Don't do something you'll regret.
[Ryou flanks the human, going full hog with trying to intimidate him...but he doesn't get close enough to brush even a single strand of fur against him. The man looks very uncomfortable at the proximity of this werewolf, much less the other.
Good. Be scared. Ryou has no sympathy in his heart for humans like these.]
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[Atem nips in the man's direction, snapping his jaws in the air. He's also careful not to touch, but it doesn't stop the man from jumping nearly out of his skin.]
You had something to do tonight, didn't you?
Introduce us to your friends.
[The man's legs look hardly capable of holding him up. But somehow, he takes a shuddering step, and then another, and another.
"Ghhhngk," is the terrified sound that slips out of his throat. "You don't -- you don't really -- I didn't have any business--"]
at last. a name for the trash man
But that is not strictly true, is it, Mr. Jacobsen? It's not very nice to lie; it'll get you into trouble one of these days, you know.
[It's a bit of a joke, at Lukas Jacobsen's expense, because of course he's been lying. He's been lying for a very long time, escalating the choices that hurt people and lining his pockets with their misfortune.
One gold eye, reflecting the nearest streetlight until it shined like a mirror, focuses on the human. What's he going to do? What's he going to say?
How far will he dig his own grave before finally jumping in?]
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Heh heh heh.
["Are you going to -- to put me into one of those traps?"]
I already explained the rules, Mr. Jacobsen. Don't make me repeat myself! All you have to do --
-- is not --
[His mouth opens wider, showing those teeth again.]
-- run.
[Mr. Jacobsen scurries along, as fast as he can make himself walk without it becoming a run. It's a terrified little power-walk. Atem keeps pace easily, following the sound of the steps.]
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But those aren't the rules.
[Ryou keeps up his pressure, but the conversational tone is light. He knows what he's doing. He's scaring him. That's his role, or at least the one he's chosen to take.
He licks his chops to drive the point home, his pink tongue passing across gleaming, sharp teeth. It's just another extension of roleplay, right? Act like a monster.
(be a monster)
Scare them.
(for him. he needs you.
and for Her. she requires it.)
Jacobsen doesn't like any of it. Oh, he doesn't like it at all, that he can't get away from the two monsters flanking him, it's very obvious on his face.]
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Then, he stops in front of a grimy-looking bar. The windows haven't been cleaned in a while. There are two people at a table, nursing beers, bored. The man stops in front of the window, raps on it to get their attention.
They look up. Their faces turn into masks of surprise and horror -- there are two fully-fledged werewolves out there. But Mr. Jacobsen mouths words at them, through the window --
Shoot them! SHOOT THEM!
The men at the table reach towards their hips and under their jackets as they leap to their feet. Meanwhile, Mr. Jacobsen turns, and takes off at a run down the street.
Atem can't see the guns the men in the bar are reaching for. But his head snaps around to follow Mr. Jacobsen. He thinks there's something off, but it's so, so hard not to give in to chase --
-- but he won't leave Ryou. Not thoughtlessly. Not until he gets an indication on what the rest of the situation is, and if Ryou wants him to chase, or stay.]
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His second mistake is to run, but that's not really Ryou's biggest concern. It should be Atem's though.]
Get him! Run!
[It's hardly an order, more of a release, because he wants to make sure Atem knows there's no reason to hold back at this point.
Though, he does add:]
Run now, he's told his men to shoot! Don't let him get away!
[Ryou is more than strong enough to handle himself, and he can see where the bullets are coming from if the men shoot. Still, if Atem gives chase, he'll follow. But his job is to be the shadow, the protector, and whatever injuries he sustains will be paid back to their mark with interest.
So go ahead, shoot him. But only if they dare, because right before he takes off, Ryou glares at the humans through the filthy window, his lips peeled back and revealing every single one of his teeth threateningly. So, will they want to shoot after that?
If so...then he'll duck any lethal shots as best he can, and carry on with the plan.
He is...trusting Atem not to kill their unlucky shyster too early, despite the werewolf instinct to do so.]
cw werewolf hunting/feeding!!
Atem can smell the man's fear in the air, his scent like a hovering ribbon left behind him. He can hear where the man is running, still running, broke the rules, tried to cheat.
He hears prey.
He turns, and he finally, finally gives chase. His feet, digitigrade and clawed, propel him off the asphalt with a jump and a burst of speed, and he's gone, down the street.
Atem never felt like this as a vampire -- not even at his hungriest. That was like an addict's craving, a more human need, despite the monstrous and inhuman nature of it. There was envy to it, a thirst for the closest thing to life again that he could have.
This isn't envy.
This is instinct.
This is animal, the way his feet pound, the way his mouth opens to pant out his body heat, the way he knows what to do when he gets closer and closer and closer, skidding around a corner and leaning into the turn, hearing when the man makes the mistake of looking over his shoulder. Atem doesn't want to drink this man's blood, as he takes one last leap, the distance perfectly judged, and sinks his jaw into the joint between the man's shoulder and neck, brings him down to the ground, his breath hot, his lungs burning with the prey smell. He doesn't want to feel this man's heart beating in his own chest. He doesn't want this man's life. Atem wants nothing from this man but meat.
Hot blood spills over his mouth, and a scream rings in his ears. It's not the blood that matters. Atem pulls a mouthful of flesh out of the man's shoulder, shirt and jacket and all, and starts to chew. It's a horrible wound, but not a fatal one.
When Ryou joins Atem, he'll find Atem seated on the moaning and sobbing man's back, pulling bits of bloody fabric out of his mouth.
But what Ryou has to deal with before he can join Atem is a spray of bullets. The men in the cafe see the werewolf and its teeth, and in their terror, they empty their clips right at the window. The other patrons in the dive bar dive for cover, glass shatters, there's screams.]
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He doesn't attack a single other patron. He only attacks those who attacked him, swiping at one with sharp claws and hooking his flesh, then slamming him roughly into his buddy. Ryou really does look a fright, golden eyes practically glowing, blood dripping down his face from his lacerated ear. He could have killed them there, of course. Just finished them off for raising a hand against a monster. But he has no reason to kill them right now, he needs to save his energy for the power he really needs to use.
And for whatever people think of him, he's not such a degenerate as to feed in public in front of a whole bar's worth of people. So, he leaves them unconscious, battered, and bleeding. Whatever else happens is not his business.
Within probably a handful of minutes, he's found his way to Atem. He can smell the blood, which is still pretty alluring to him, both as a feeding type and because of what it's a precursor of.
Feeding.
He's probably quite the sight, unfortunately, with bleeding wounds on his side, arms, and one ear practically folded in half from where the skin had been torn open by an errant shot. Ryou knew what he was getting into though. And so now did Jacobsen.
For a moment, Ryou glances at Atem...then he looks back to the human he's pinning. The amount of self-control Atem exercises against his instincts is...it's honestly very impressive. Ryou will definitely be complimenting him later for not tearing Mr. Jacobsen's throat clean out and leaving less than half a corpse for Ryou to pick at, because Ryou hadn't offered Mukuro the same courtesy on his first hunt.
For now though...]
The way I figure it...you must be stupid.
[Ryou's words come out guttural, animalistic. Much as Atem's had, at the start of all this.]
The rules were simple, and rather than follow them, you set your gunmen on us. There's a price that must be paid.
[And as he says that, Ryou tromps slowly, heavily, to where Mr. Jacobsen could see him, could hear the heavy droplets of blood splatter to the ground from Ryou's wounds.]
That's alright though, I already know how people like you are. You're the kind of person who would s̵̪̺̈́̄̚ë̸͓́̉͜ḷ̷͇̊̑l̵͓͇̥̈ ̶͓̮̼̂h̸̳͌̈́͛í̶̤͚̗͑s̴̱̏ ̵̮̞̫̀̔̆s̷̰̤͂̄o̷͇̻͝u̶̙̔l̵͓͔̠̈̇͘ ̶̼̱̏̆͝ͅf̸̯͑͝ȯ̷̭͖͕̿̀ŕ̵̪͘͝ ̵̧̪͙̈́a̸̧̘̤͌͝ ̶͎̎͝c̷̖̯͕̅h̸̺̑͐̒a̴̠̯͌̇̐n̷̬̖͊͜c̷͍̩̏͂ȇ̷̲ ̷̢̞͒a̷͚̱͗̅̓t̴̲̣̱̄ ̸̫͙͖̀͘̚l̴̩̬̲̄͊i̶̢͔͚͂̕ň̸̘̥̕i̷̙̜͖͊n̵̻͖̎g̷̛͚̿̐ ̷͚̭̌h̵͉̺͆i̵̠̅̍s̶̟͊̆̀ ̶̡̤̮̆p̷͓̈̾̋o̵͉͙̯͌̋̚c̴̩̓̀̌k̸̞̉̒e̷̪̒ẗ̵̬̤̬͑̚s̴̬͒͂
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He still wanted to rip his claws down the jacket, tear it out of the way, and feed.
But Atem wants his sight back more.
And, on top of that...he sniffs the air as Ryou approaches. He smells blood, Ryou's blood, and hears it splatter on the ground. Gold brows draw up above the bandages -- Ryou's hurt, is he okay, he should be cared for, the guns--! But Ryou...Ryou's still talking. He's on his feet, he's taking charge of the next phase, and Atem trusts him to be strong. His mouth, which opened when he smelled the blood, closes.
He stands, pressing one foot on the back of the whimpering man -- "No, no, no no no please no oh god it hurts, my arm, my arm" -- and spits one last bloody clump of fabric out to the side, onto the ground.]
I'll leave it to you.
[Atem's part in this has been played. It's Ryou's show now.
...
But he does grind his heel into the man's back with a little more force than necessary. This is for the bullet wounds, he thinks, with enough vitriol Jacobsen just might hear him.]
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...Then again, a year ago, he hadn't had the Fog in his mind, he hadn't woken up one day to see someone taking the one person here cared for most in this place, and died trying to stop him.
Now, with his priorities, with Atem to protect...and with Her strength, Her knowledge and perspective helping him come to these decisions, Ryou is different. When Atem finally pulls back and leaves it in his hands, Ryou's first move is to shove Jacobsen onto his back. It doesn't matter how he screams, how he pleads, and god does he plead.
"Please, please! I'll give you anything! I'll shut my business down, I swear--"]
A price will be paid. But you don't get to set the terms of it, Mr. Jacobsen. Not when you couldn't even follow a simple direction. We didn't have to be the monsters you thought we were, you were given a choice. Do you think I was? Or him?
You've been here all your life, Mr. Jacobsen. You've seen many monsters come and go, and you've built a life around them, knowing that every day could be your last, and you still betray your fellow man.
[Ryou leans in close, flattening one pawlike hand against Jacobsen's chest, leaning in close. Blood drips from his ear onto Jacobsen's cheek, mixing with sweat and dirt and more blood, but not Ryou's.]
You've seen that people like me show up here human, not wanting to kill to feed. I didn't choose this.
But you did. And at least you can rest easy knowing that you won't have to live your hell again and again.
[He pauses there, looks to Atem, but the weight of his strong, heavy arm means Jacobsen can't wriggle away. All he can do is whine and beg and ask to be let up...which Ryou ignores.]
Atem. Remove your bandages, please.
cw burns/eye scream
Is this what the strength Ryou wants looks like?
Well. Metaphorically looks like.
Atem reaches behind his head and unhooks the end of the cloth, unwinding and unwinding and unwinding, pulling the formerly sterile, now soiled gauze off of his empty eye sockets. The burns are much better than they were, the remaining pain easy enough to shrug off for the sake of a friend's party, but they're not healed, not fully. And his eyes...haven't come back.
It's an ugly sight, the kind that's hard to look at, that human instincts scream at you to look away from, in case it happens to you.]
same here, plus definite eye gore
All of what he'd said was honest, if a little bit theatrical. He's honestly very fortunate to have watched Atem say and do these kinds of things before. But those words are his feelings, and there's much more overt emotion in them than the ease in which Atem taunts his enemies.
But the theatricality falls away when Atem's empty sockets are revealed, and a prickle of fear creeps up Ryou's spine as he realizes what he's about to do. It's quickly pushed back, but...for a moment, it might be easy to sense.]
I'm going to show you what it's like now, sir. When you're a monster and this place decides you're strong enough to endure whatever it makes you experience.
[Certainly his words don't have the same weight as before. There's something else. He doesn't look at Jacobsen--who is starting to squirm, though the chunk torn out of his arm makes it difficult for him to do much other than cry out and writhe--but instead he's focused only on Atem. Only on those burns, the emptiness of those sockets, the dried blood and wrinkled, discolored, ruined skin...
With his free hand, he reaches out and takes one of Atem's, holding it firmly. He hopes that the tremor in his fingers can't be felt. Even if it was...it'll be eclipsed soon enough by the familiar sensation that accompanies Ryou trying to siphon the pain of others into himself. That's how it should feel at first, like their shared contact is a balm, easing what pain lingers from Atem's injury. Slowly, slowly, Ryou can see the burns start to become less severe at the edges, and there's an uncomfortable itching, burning sensation just below his eyes as fur falls away, skin puckers and reddens.
It's almost like watching the sands of an hourglass transfer from one side to the other, and it stings, but it doesn't override the pain of the bullet wounds yet, so Ryou endures.
Within a few long seconds, his eyes start to itch and his vision starts to go hazy. Ryou's still looking at Atem, but the edges of his form are starting to become hard to see.]
C...close your eyes, Atem. Close them, you don't want to s-see when it h...happens--a-ahhh...nngh!!
[And very soon, he will be able to, because after about another six or seven seconds, Ryou's vision goes dark, and he screams, unable to stop his claws from digging into Jacobsen's chest somewhat, or from pricking painfully at Atem's skin. Ryou's eyes are gone, ruptured and dripping from his own sockets in a mimicry of Atem's initial injury. Even though it's been so long...there's just no scenario in which Ryou wouldn't have suffered this pain, though there's a little mercy in that the burns convert quickly.
....Doesn't make him feel better, it still fucking hurts. It'll take him a moment longer to refocus so he can redirect the agony. After all, Ryou is quite terrible with pain tolerance.
But Atem will be able to see now, if Ryou did it right. God he hopes he did it right, please, please...!!]
eye gore!!
He feels the pain go, first.
Then, he feels the skin on his face change, soften, feel more like what he's used to.
And finally --
-- finally, the emptiness behind his eyelids, the horrible open-air wound, isn't empty anymore. He doesn't feel the night-air inside his skull, touching scabbed-over vessels and nerves and bone. He blinks, for the first time in over a week, and his vision, his real vision, clears. He draws in a breath -- he did it. Ryou did it.
But Atem doesn't look away. He looks to Ryou, who is gripping his hand hard enough to hurt, and he sees Ryou's eyes burst, and hears him scream, and his heart aches.
Ryou would do this for him. It means so much...so much.
Atem grips his hand back.]
It's all right. It worked. It worked -- you're doing it. You're doing so well, just hold on...
[Murmuring encouragement is all he can do: Ryou has to handle the rest of this, with his powers. Atem knows Ryou won't die, not from this, but if the second part of this doesn't work, and Ryou has to wait to recover from these wounds, Atem's wounds, if the gamble doesn't pay off...Atem will care for him for as long as it takes. His free hand comes up to Ryou's upper back, supporting, reassuring.]
eye gore, blood, gunshot wounds, and cannibalism
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i had to use this icon for maximum evil man-eating energy
oh my GOD, cursed. Anyway cw cannibalism.